Thursday, November 09, 2006


First of all, let me say that I’m very excited about the results of the election. I’m happy that the overwhelming majority finally realized that Bush and his cronies are a bunch of idiots. Now it’s the Democrats turn to show just what morons they can be! Go Dems!

Also, the proposed cigarette tax in California failed. The proposition would have increased the cost of a pack of smokes by over $2. A ridiculously unfair tax levied on a small number of taxpayers. Yes, okay, I understand that smoking is bad (I smoke…and I’m trying to quit…there, I said it. I’m trying to quit. Happy now?!), and I approve of encouraging others to quit, or better yet, not to start smoking in the first place. But the cigarette tax as a way to make people quit smoking seemed like a plan similar to the president’s plan to “democratize” Iraq. But the proposition wasn’t greeted as a liberator and cigarettes remain “affordable” at only a little over $4 a pack. Thank goodness.

Okay, this sort of leads me to my point today. As we all know, cigarettes are the root of all of America’s problems. I mean if we didn’t have second hand smoke there would virtually be no more death! The trains would run on time. Brittany Spears could have worked things out with K-Fed. There would be no more drunk drivers, drug deals gone bad, kidnappings, rape, mental illness, air pollution, asthma (as we know, the smog in LA is made up almost entirely of cigarette smoke) and the price of a barrel of crude wouldn’t hold the country hostage anymore.

The city of Santa Monica has taken this to heart, they’ve pass an ordinance to ban smoking on their beaches, at their public areas, restaurant patios, bus stops, movie theatre lines and the Third Street Promenade (which means that since I won’t be able to advertise that I’m a smoker by…well…smoking, questionable people will no longer harass me for smokes, they’ll have to settle for loose change).

Good for Santa Monica, right? I mean, they’ve really taken the public’s health and made it a priority.

Well, on Tuesday voters overwhelmingly approved Measure Y which establishes that crimes involving the adult, personal use of marijuana are the lowest law-enforcement priority for the Santa Monica Police Department.

Yep, it’s now more illegal to smoke cigarettes on Santa Monica streets than it is to smoke pot.

No, no, I can see the logic here. It’s not like marijuana is a hard core drug. I get that. People don’t smoke pot and go crazy. It’s not like Reefer Madness out there. Marijuana is a pretty harmless narcotic (especially if you already have a relatively low amount of brain activity). I mean the only aspect of pot smoking that could be harmful is the smoke. But it’s only a plant. No one has ever been harmed by inhaling the smoke produced by burning a plant right? Besides, the smoke produced by burning a joint or lighting a pipe isn’t really smoke at all. It’s pot smoke. It comes with a really cool mellow buzz.

Here’s the key to making pot smoking safer than cigarette smoking: Hold the smoke in your lungs as long as is humanly possible.

…Santa Monica…

Fucking morons.

Fun Fact: Okay, I’m going to say something kind of embarrassing here, but it’s a fact so I thought I’d share it.

As you know, Kirstie Alley wore a “bikini” on Oprah…

…I thought she was kind of hot.

I must be getting old.

Also, I was looking on the internet to find some pictures of the Santa Monica Pier sign, I couldn’t find any good ones fast, but I remembered that I did some location scouting recently in Santa Monica, so I thought I’d throw my own picture up.

Also also, as an extra bonus, if you’ve ever wondered what it looks like under the famous Santa Monica pier…

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