Tuesday, May 11, 2004

Blocking Up the Scenery, Breaking My Mind…

Has it come to this?!

I know, it’s just a sign. What you can’t see from my fantabulous picture is that this sign is posted at every entrance of – a parking garage! It’s just recently been hung on the huge apartment building down the street.

What I don’t understand is why the cigarette smoke garners so much attention from this sign? Sure, cigarette smoke is dangerous. Sure. I get it. But, come on California, what about all the carbon monoxide generated from the 40 plus cars that drive in and out of there every day?! I smoke, so I know, cigarette smoke and car exhaust are pretty much the same thing. Delicious!

Look out, there are toxic chemicals in that parking garage!

I think that our tax dollars could be used to warn people of greater dangers than the occasional puff of cigarette smoke amidst smog-and-global-warming-causing SUVs. I’ve come up with a couple warning signs of my own.

You would think that with all the “street cleaning” that goes on in LA, the streets would shine like David Helfgott. You would think so…

Cigarette smoking, nothing! This is how I’m going to die…I’ve seen it in a dream.

I’m joking. Don’t freak out, I’m not clairvoyant, just remarkably intuitive.

When will this end? I hope soon. I can’t take it anymore! Truly, it’s amazing that the human race has survived so long! What did our ancestors do before their government started making signs?

I supposed that they burned to death after biting on hot curling irons or something.

Fun Fact: I’ve been doing some Prop. 65 research and I’ve discovered that it’s an anti “false advertising” initiative. But now environmental groups are using it to warn the public about hazards that they might not be aware of. I.e. “no one told be that this foot powder would cause cancer! Had I known, I would have bought the non-cancer causing foot powder!” or “I was looking for a carbon monoxide-free parking garage! Your advertisement said nothing about carbon monoxide in the parking garage!” These signs usually show up to prevent lawsuits. I suppose that we’ll all have to get used to them. “Hey, McDonalds, you’re fry sign says nothing about salt, and obviously, there is salt on these fries! Lawyer up Mickey D’s!”


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