Every once in a while my real self and my cartoon persona split. I really do get scales smashed over my head and think that a bottle of bleach is a cute little gnome, but today there is one very big difference. I’m actually going to write something.
That’s great news for me, but horribly sad news for you. I’m not going to post anything this morning. What will you do? I don’t know, make yourself a nice relaxing cup of tea and try to get by the best you can.
It will all be alright soon.
As you settle down with your tea, try and think of the things that I was going to post about today until I got a flourish of halfway decent ideas. Think about the Carnival cruise ship that was hit by a 70-foot wave causing people to panic and cancel the rest of their vacation plans. Imagine what I would say about that. Picture me writing about what excitable morons people have become to let some broken windows and a little scare at sea force them to live their lives in terror. Visualize me pointing out the fact that there is no such thing as being completely safe when your in the middle of the ocean, no matter how ridiculously humongous the boat is. In your mind’s eye, see me commenting on how outrageously unrealistic the general population’s expectations of security have become. And then picture me getting angry at the news media for calling into question the seaworthiness of the ship. After all, it did get hit with a 70-foot wave and all that happened was 4 people got hurt and some windows were shattered.
Then imagine that me ending the whole post with something side-splittingly hilarious.
Because, man, am I ever side-splittingly freakin’ hilarious!
Fun Fact: The latest TAM Cartoon is up! Imagilicious!
Imagine that this fun fact was “fun.”
Come on, you can do it.