Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Ruined By Hollywood

Things are rarely as they are in the movies. You’d think that was obvious, right? Not always. I think we have an unreasonable assumption of human behavior. Especially when there’s a crisis. We expect people to panic. But we expect them to panic in a certain way.

“Movie Panic” involves a lot of screaming, a lot of flailing, a lot of slapping people back to reality. Most of all, a lot of trampling.

And yes, the heroic acts of an authority figure. Say…a pilot.

But as the old saying goes, truth is stupider than fiction. If you’ve ever needed proof that people act differently in reality than they do in action movies when there’s a crisis of epic proportions, then the Air France plane crash in Toronto is just that.

First let me say that I’m extremely happy that everyone got out alive. You have to give it up to the flight crew on this one. They somehow managed to keep everyone on task, it seems. And sure, flight attendants are trained for these things, but in reality, if you’re ever in a plane crash, chances are that it’s the first one for your flight attendants as well. They could just as easily panic as you can.

But the Air France crew didn’t panic. At least not too bad. And everyone escaped with their lives.

But here’s the thing that made me scratch my head a little this morning. I know that people get a little loopy after a traumatic event. But some of these people did something I would never have though anybody would do in this type of situation.

I’m sure you’re familiar with the plane crash that I’m referring to. The plane, trying to land in rough weather, skidded off the end of a Toronto runway and into a group of trees. It finally rested near a major roadway and started to burn. People jumped to safety etc…

But a few of the passengers, a pilot included, decided that their best hope for assistance was to run to the side of the major roadway and flag down passing cars for help.

You know, I’d be willing to bet that the unbelievably trained, professional Airport Rescue Crew might have noticed that a huge silver tube with gigantic wings sticking out of the sides, flashing red, white and blue lights just skidded off the end of the runway and is now shooting flames and smoke 50 feet into the air.

But one can’t assume too much I suppose. And who knows, one of the drivers of one of those cars could have been legendary Canadian Superhero Captain Canuck.

And then they would have felt stupid for not flagging down commuters.

Fun Fact: Kevin has added a “fun stuff” section to his web site. It includes the immortal theme song for his website, aptly entitled “” A song written and performed by me.

Go check it out!

While you’re there, you can also hear Kevin’s incredibly cool answering machine message (just click “next”).

You won’t be disappointed. Unless you’re a malcontent. Or have unreasonably high expectations. In which case you’re probably reading this and thinking “yeah, right, like I don’t have anything better to do…”

I hate to break it to you, but if you’re reading this and thinking that then no, you don’t have anything better to do. So go and enjoy yourself for once. No one will think you’re a geek if you allow yourself to feel. Just let us in. It’s all we’re asking. Permission to love you. And we give you permission to love yourself. It’s okay…let it all out…that’s good…it’s okay to cry.

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