Now, there have been comments on this blog about how I never buy Christmas presents, or any other kind of present for that matter. Now I have proof.
It was Brandon’s birthday recently. The creator and custodian of Tournament of Stuff. The infamous 2000th Visitor. Happy birthday Brandon. See, here’s a picture of Brandon opening the gift that we got him (okay so Tanya bought it, but she had my full support and approval).
So Brandon had his birthday party blah, blah, blah, he turned like 35 or something blah, blah, blah…
Let’s talk about that wrapping job shall we?
Look at that! Stunning, isn’t it? It has handles! HANDLES! Thomas Edison himself could not have engineered a better gift transmitter. And you don’t need to go to some fancy gift wrap store to buy some fancy gift wrap…from the store. Trader Joes is lousy with the stuff. All you need is a paper bag with handles and a little genius.
Luckily I had both.
When was the last time you got a present with handles?! I’ll bet never! NEVER! This present had handles. HANDLES!
Sadly, it was destroyed by Brandon in a callous – some might even say selfish – frenzied grab for the gift inside. It really brought the party down I tell you. Sad, sad, sad. And take another look at that picture of the birthday boy opening his present. Look at that evil expression. He’s taking pleasure from the massacre!
Some people can’t recognize brilliance when they see it.
Goodbye Trader Joes gift wrap job that Tanya and I did. We’ll always miss you. You were a shining beacon of hope. But you flew too close to the sun and your star burned out too soon so now the world is left in the dark. Because there’s no more beacon of hope, which was you…a beacon. You’re wrapping DVD sets with the angels now. Your footprints are angels on the sand…footprints…
I WAS CARRYING YOU AT THE TIME!...
Oh, the grief….
Fun Fact: The Christmas album is almost finished. It should be done in less than a month! Then I can actually get a life! Yeah! But be aware that this is just an estimate...
They could just be really, really early for Christmas 2005?!