Friday, November 19, 2004

General Wackiness

No, he’s not the latest Presidential appointee to the cabinet; I’m talking about Vioxx and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Duh.

So, Vioxx causes heart problems. Huh. No one saw that one coming did they? People thought that they were going to get relief from arthritis and ended up with bad tickers. Now the television and the web are full of lawyers out for “justice.”

The FDA is also under attack for letting the drug go to the marketplace. They should have known that it was unsafe. They should only let the safe drugs onto pharmacy shelves. Only the safe ones!

There are a couple other drugs now under investigation. One for obesity, one for asthma, one for acne…

But my question is, when was the last time you ever saw a “safe” drug?! Look, anything that alters your physiological makeup is bound to be dangerous. We have to be careful. I’m not saying that Merck and the FDA aren’t to blame a little bit, but come on people, if you’re going to tale a prescription drug – research it! Now, I know that this is a special case, but if the drug says that it may cause death, pay attention! It’s not always just legal BS.

And where are the doctors during all this? Why do doctors pass around prescription drugs like herbal ecstasy at a high school prom?! Why don’t we blame them? And don’t give me that crap about doctor’s not knowing the dangers. If your freaking doctor doesn’t know that drugs are dangerous then either get a new Dr or just have a heart attack or an embolism and get it over with.

But listen, I’m also not saying that doctors should be to blame either. We have to take some responsibility here. Why is it that we always make someone else responsible for what we put in our mouths? Drugs, fatty hamburgers, tobacco, grits, small electric toy trains…

There’s a problem here. A fundamental problem. Supporters re-elected Goerge Bush partially because John Edwards was a trial lawyer. Too much litigation. I agree with you Bushies, there is too much litigation. But, see, that won’t stop until you people stop suing other people. That’s what litigation is! It’s not the devil. It is us. Lawyers don’t always make the cases. They need clients.

People want the government to be smaller, but they want it to protect us from terrorists and bad drugs and small electric toy trains. We can’t have it both ways. Yes, Merck was wrong to push a dangerous drug onto the American public. Doctors were wrong for prescribing it. But patients are also wrong for naively popping pills.

I feel bad for the victims of Vioxx, and I don’t want to sound like a cold-hearted bastard, but if things are going to change, we have to take some responsibility. We need to be more accountable in order to make the drug companies and the FDA more accountable. As we know from childhood, the “I didn’t know” defense only goes so far. And ignorance only makes it possible for this to happen again. Did we learn nothing from Thalidomide?

Okay, now to Governor Arnold. He wants to run for president. A group of people are running ads in an attempt to bring together enough supporters for a constitutional change that would allow just that.

Why?! Already?!

The dude’s only been in office for a little while. Let’s not be naïve and pretend that this is some benevolent move geared toward allowing all immigrants to enter the oval office (as something other than a janitor I mean). This is about Arnold. It’s all about Arnold.

It’s dumb.

Why Arnold? Haven’t there been more interesting immigrants up to the task? But, no, people have to have it now! They have to have Arnold. Arnold will always be cool, right? Let’s change the constitution for someone cool like Arnold! He’s cool!

Well, at least it’s not an impulsive decision. While we’re at it, let’s name Destiny’s Child, the bestest female singing group of all time! Or better yet, Chair-Booties of the Joint Chiefs of Booty!

Take that, Andrews Sisters!

Fun Fact: Okay, I was going to make an off-color joke about Thalidomide babies. I was going to say that they’re unfortunate because not only are the poor things born with flippers instead of arms, but those flippers don’t help them swim really fast either.

Then I accidentally found this page while making sure that Thalidomide babies actually had the problems that I thought they did. Now I’m not so sure.

Poor kids. Maybe the new TAM Cartoon will make me look like less of an ass. Probably not.

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